As many of you know last Saturday we brought my oldest son to college. Looking back to last year at this time, I was very excited for what was ahead of him....we had a great time researching and visiting colleges through out the summer and fall of 2010. I think I was as nervous as Daniel each and every time he had to audition. You see not only did Daniel have to apply to these colleges but because of his major (musical theater) he had to audition. The end result out of the nine colleges he applied to eight accepted him and all with scholarships! You can imagine the pride and excitement I felt as a mom. But one year later my pride is still here 100% but now my excitement has turned into sadness....not for him but for me!(selfish I know)
So the day came on Saturday Aug.27,2011 that we packed him up and sent him down to the big scary New York City. Of course to add to my mental state or lack of we were driving down in the middle of the Northeast first potential hurricane in many many years. I had decided that I was not even going to try and be strong so from the minute my feet hit the ground that day the tears began to fall. The move in was extremely smooth and quite organized, we put all of his stuff away and I made his bed (of course the entire time trying to convince him it would be a great idea for me to stay awhile) As we said our goodbyes I just wanted him to know just how incredibly proud his father and I were of him and that there was no doubt in our minds that he would be a huge success and continue to make us proud. As we walked out his door I had a great idea I would inadvertently leave my purse behind so that I would have to go back to get it....what you should know is that when Daniel was a little boy anytime I would leave the house he would ask me to leave my purse so that he knew I would be back soon! In all of the commotion I forgot to leave it and next thing I knew me and my purse were on the elevator! As we drove the three hours home in the pouring rain and heavy winds I reflected on a lot and asked myself these questions.....Did I give him the skills to make it on his own? Did I forget to tell him and does he know just how much I love him? Would he know that no matter what I would always be there for him? So many people have told me in the past three days what a great, well rounded, grounded man Daniel has become. Thanks to everyone who has helped me work through these past couple of days and I now know that Daniel is as awesome as I think he is and that he will do great. I will not lie there is still a great deal of sadness knowing that he is not tucked in his bed at the end of the hall every night BUT I also have that excitement back that I had last year in what the future will hold for him!!
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